Firstly let’s go ahead and look at women who could be reading this who are interested in the church, have felt the spirit, abide by tge church’s general teachings already, and want to learn more…..but they’re not members. I have had so many friends, both male and female, who have been automatically rejected by a single LDS man or women because they are not members. I’d like to say, as my opinion, that this is very unfair. I have also seen that happen and because of the instant rejection, the person feels like they are not good enough and that labels are what matter. I think it’s important that we remember that when we say and write and do these thibgs, we are doing them in representation of the church. In fact, the representation of Christ.

Regarding pornography, I have had past boyfriends who have (and were when I began dating them) struggling with pornography. I know how it feels to be where you discussed. Pornography in my opinion is the most insidious of all addictions, and by far the most poisonous to love and healthy beautiful relationships. It is difficult! Additionally, I have never once broken up with a guy because of that. I am happy to help someone as best I can, however the AGENCY LIES WITH THE MAN OR WOMAN WHO IS ADDICTED. I will not disrespect myself for an extended period of time by being in a toxic relationship where love cannot be because of this addiction. So I think a line needs to be drawn, meaning, if it’s 6 months into your relationship, even 3 months I would say, and the person is still viewing it, they do not have the self control to be in a relationship. They should not have the privilege of being in a relationship at that time until they gain that maturity and self control to stop looking at porn. What I’m trying to say goes right along with Elder Holland’s quote at the end of the article.

Right along the same lines the point about modesty. I personally think modesty is important, because it reenforces our divine nature as women each time we choose what to wear and decide why we want to wear that. Modesty is about women choosing to not reveal certain parts of their bodies out of respect for themselves or their preference. Again though, as a member, I feel that since I was a beehive we were told to dress modestly for men. I have come to believe strongly dressing modestly is for US as women, not for men. I think the way the importance of modesty has been portrayed can sometimes be rather disrespectful to men. Proverbs 23:7 reads “As a man thinketh, so is he.” A man should be able to control himself if let’s say, a kind, Christ- like woman who happens to not be a member wears something immodest on the first date. Even if she were a member, again the agency would lie with the man. I know you brethren have self control, and those who do not, should not be dating because they haven’t reached that milestone yet.

I truly appreciate the sincerity and insight you brethren put together to write this article. That is why I took the time to write out such a long response because it was so thought provoking and I appreciated the fact that you all wrote this. Just as most of it was your opinions, so was mine. I hope that I could bring something to the table in my response.