You anxiously wait for your prayers to be answered. You thought God would help you through it. But it didn’t happen. You start to feel disappointed. Then, you thought He never listened. You feel He wasn’t there when you needed Him. Then, you begin to doubt if God existed.

Stop right there! Don’t go further away from what you know is true.

God Answers in His Own Time and in His Own Way

God does answer prayers. But you must know that He answers in His own time and in His own way. Sometimes, answers come instantly. Most of the time, you must wait. And yes, it can be painful to know that there will be times that God’s answer is a big fat NO!

It can be very frustrating when you are already expecting that God will grant you all things you desired. You see, it’s not really that God did not answer your prayer. Sometimes He knows better than what we deserved, because He knows us better.

Sometimes, it can be a blessing that your relationship with someone didn’t work out because you were meant to find someone better. You soon will realize that there had been some red flags or unhealthy patterns in the relationship that you had been unwilling to see.

Sometimes, it can be a blessing that you didn’t get your dream job. Multiple interviewers rejected your application even if you have put your best foot forward. And you wonder why you did not qualify even if you have the right credentials or experience. Perhaps taking that dream job could mean a huge chunk of family time to sacrifice. Or perhaps God didn’t want you to experience the kind of environment and culture you will be dealing with in the workplace.

Soon you will thank Him for removing certain people or opportunities from your life because you never knew how toxic they would have been. When you accept the reality and start moving on with your life, you look back to understand that His ways are better than yours.

Elder Richard G. Scott (1928–2015) of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles taught: “[Our Father in Heaven’s] invitation ‘Ask, and ye shall receive’ (3 Nephi 27:29) does not assure that you will get what you want. It does guarantee that, if worthy, you will get what you need, as judged by a Father that loves you perfectly, who wants your eternal happiness even more than do you.”

No matter what happens, never cease to pray. Remember, He is always listening. He always wants what is best for us even if it doesn’t seem like it.

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Even though God listens, He wants us to talk to Him sincerely

God is an all-knowing and all-powerful Being. This is an eternal truth. But, a more important truth that we need to know and understand is that God is also our loving Father in Heaven. Bearing these two truths in mind, I know that God does not only have the capability but also the willingness to listen to our prayers. However, just because He has all-hearing ears does not mean that we can just say anything we want in whatever manner we want to. Just as we listen better to a song that is sung soulfully than to a song delivered halfheartedly, I know that God listens more intently to those who try to talk to him sincerely.

Gordon B. Hinckley once said, “The trouble with most of our prayers is that we give them as if we were picking up the phone and ordering groceries – we place our order and hang up.” If this is the manner we pray to God, I’m not surprised if He won’t be as enthusiastic to listen to us compared to someone who treats prayer like an important phone call interview. Maybe more than questioning why God is not listening to our prayers, we should first question how we say our prayers. God is our Father, but He is also a King in every sense. He deserves our utmost respect. Whenever we pray we should act like we are approaching a throne.

As we pray more intently and sincerely, I know that the promise is sure: “Ask, and it shall be given unto you…For every one that asketh, receiveth (3 Nephi 14:7-8).”

Even though God listens He doesn’t always answer us with a YES

Two months ago, I received an evident and powerful promise when I asked Him sincerely for a specific thing. It was one day that I was exhausted from work, but I had to face a more exhausting two-to-three-hour commute back home. While I was standing in line, hungry and tired, to ride public transportation, I remembered wishing in my heart that I could eat a chocolate bar. I had this clear image in my mind of what brand, size, and flavor it would be.

After some time, the van that would take me home arrived and I got inside. I was about to sit in my spot when I saw what seemed like a shiny wrapper. I picked it up, and you wouldn’t believe what I saw. It was the exact chocolate bar I had been thinking of eating a few minutes ago! I asked the people beside me if the chocolate bar happened to belong to them, and they all said no. I gripped the chocolate bar tightly in my hand while fighting the urge to cry. It might have been a small thing but it was proof that God listens to the silent pleadings of my heart.

Even though I know that God listens to my prayers and I’ve had powerful experiences to prove it, I do not expect a chocolate bar to appear on my seat every time I ask God for it. Like many of you, I have learned that God’s answers to prayers, more often than not, are “No, you need to wait.” Whenever God answers me “No, you need to wait,” I’m always a bit disappointed until later, when I find out the grand reason behind His not-so-favorable answer. I have learned that momentary heartaches are sometimes the small price that I have needed to pay to qualify myself for an even greater blessing.

When the answer to our prayers is not a “yes,” it is easy for us to conclude that God is not listening – that He doesn’t love us. But, here’s another eternal truth – God knows us better than we know ourselves. If we only look a little closer, we will see that the “No’s” and “Wait’s” are strong manifestations of His infinite love for us.

Even though God listens He wants us to act.

Many of us know what prayer is and how to do it, but I don’t think we know enough about the whole process. Prayer does not stop when we get off our knees and say Amen. We can only understand and feel the full power of prayer when we stand on our feet and act regardless of God’s answer.

To give you an example, I will continue with my chocolate bar story. A few days after that experience, I was going home with a coworker who knew about the miracle chocolate bar. I told her I was tired and hungry and craving Korean-flavored chicken. She jokingly replied that I should not expect to find chicken on my seat again. Well, guess what? She’s right. I didn’t find one on my seat, but I still ate Korean-flavored chicken that day. Do you know how? Well, the answer is simple. I went to the mall, looked for a Korean fast-food restaurant, and bought the chicken I wanted to eat.

If you compare these two experiences I had with the chocolate bar and the Korean-flavored chicken, it seemed like God did not answer my prayer in the latter incident. However, I think that God answered me in both instances – only in different ways. He served me the food the first time, but He inspired me to act the second time. I was happy and satisfied both times.

I know that prayer is not limited to three action words talking, listening, and answering. It also has everything to do with doing. When we act after we pray, we are showing God that we will do our best to qualify to receive His blessings. And, yes, these blessings may not always be the ones we are expecting, but for those who ask and work for what they want, God always has promises in store.

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In the Doctrine & Covenants, we read the account of Martin Harris asking Joseph Smith to inquire of God whether he could take the 116-page Book of Mormon manuscript home so his family could see it. Joseph inquired twice and God did not permit it. But Martin begged Joseph to ask God one more time. This time, He permitted Martin to take the manuscript home, to show only to his wife and certain members of his family. And then the unfortunate happened, Martin lost the manuscript—all 116 pages of it.

So did Joseph and Martin change the will of God? No. God’s will was to hasten the translation of the Book of Mormon, and knowing that many people wanted to get a hold of the manuscript, He did not permit Martin to take it because losing it would mean delaying the translation. But because Joseph and Martin were very insistent, He allowed it. He allowed it so Joseph and Martin could learn, through exercising their own agency, what would bring them happiness or misery.

We cannot change the will of God, but we can be comforted knowing that His will is for us to return to His presence again. He has our welfare at heart and when we receive an answer, we can be sure that He is leading us a little closer to our heavenly home.

While we cannot persuade Him to yield to our desires, He also does not want to override our agency to be able to choose and act for ourselves. Like Martin, there may be times that if we pray hard enough, God will allow us to do as we desire so we can learn from the experience.

Oftentimes, if we allow it, these experiences can help us better understand the will and ways of the Almighty God and allow us to see how aligning our will to His leads to joy and peace. As we do so, we become more sensitive to the whispering of His Spirit—enlightening us with things that will help us reach our potential and warning us to avoid things that will impede our growth.

So the next time we think of trying to change the will of God, let’s ask ourselves if that’s really what we want to happen. Like Martin, God might let us do as we please, but afterwards, we might also feel sorrow, similar to Martin and Joseph’s over losing the manuscript.

Let’s trust God and His will—this is the only way we can successfully navigate this often-treacherous mortal existence, become what He wants us to become, and eventually joyfully return to His presence again someday.

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1. I WILL STUDY MORE DILIGENTLY.

Jesus taught us to: “Seek ye out of the best books words of wisdom; seek learning, even by study and also by faith.” (D&C 88:118). He also commanded us to “Search the scriptures; for in them ye think ye have eternal life: and they are they which testify of me.” (John 5:39)

A daily study of the scripture is like putting oil to our lamps in order for us to shine our light. Our testimony grows, our faith in Jesus Christ is strengthened and we will be better at making decisions every day of our lives. We receive divine revelations as we carefully read them every day, at least for 30 minutes or so.

As you do your personal study, you may also secure a pen and a study journal to write down some of your thoughts or sudden strokes of impressions. Markers or colored pens will also help highlight your favorite quotes or scripture verses.

Our study to spiritual matters is as essential as learning to secular things. At some point in time, we will find ourselves in the role of a provider in which may require educational attainment or work experience. Resolve to continue furthering your knowledge and expanding your horizons so you can better provide for yourself and for your family. Strive to be self-reliant and not too overly dependent on others.

May we be reminded of the words in 2 Nephi 9: 28-29:

“O the vainness, and the frailties, and the foolishness of men! When they are learned they think they are wise, and they hearken not unto the counsel of God, for they set it aside, supposing they know of themselves, wherefore, their wisdom is foolishness and it profiteth them not. And they shall perish.”

“But to be learned is good if they hearken unto the counsels of God.”

The key here is to find balance in acquiring secular and spiritual learning. Put your best efforts toward studying more effectively the gospel of Jesus Christ and striving to learn more about the world around you.

2. I WILL PRAY MORE EARNESTLY.

The Lord has counseled us to “Pray always, that you may come off conqueror; yea that you may conquer Satan, and that you may escape the hands of the servants of Satan that do uphold his work.” (D&C 10:5)

If you have been praying every day of your life, pray even more. Prayer is a shield from Satan’s fiery darts. As the Lord is hastening His work, Satan is also doubling his strength so he can lure us into his traps and be led away from the path of truth and righteousness.

The words in 2 Nephi 32: 8-9 always ring true:

“… if ye would hearken unto the Spirit which teacheth a man to pray, ye would know that ye must pray; for the evil spirit teacheth not a man to pray, but teacheth him that he must not pray.”

“But behold, I say unto you that ye must pray always, and not faint; that ye must not perform any thing unto the Lord save in the first place ye shall pray unto the Father in the name of Christ, that he will consecrate thy performance unto thee, that thy performance may be for the welfare of thy soul.”

Each time we earnestly pray and think of Him, we will have the blessings, guidance, protection, support and comfort we need to face the difficult trials and challenges in life. When we offer our heartfelt gratitude unto Him through prayer, the more we find peace in our hearts and happiness each and every day of our lives. The moment we pray fervently, the more our burdens may become lighter.

3.  I WILL SERVE MORE WILLINGLY.

In Doctrine and Covenants 58: 27, it says:

“Verily I say, men should be anxiously engaged in a good cause, and do many things of their own free will, and bring to pass much righteousness”.

Opportunities to serve are all around you. The question sometimes is, “How?” or “Where should I begin?” Your participation in #LightTheWorld campaign was a good start. By doing small and simple things, you will bring much light to those whom you serve.

Howard W. Hunter taught, “You will be most happy and successful in life whose interests are coupled with giving assistance to others and helping them find the way.”

Little acts of kindness may not be recognized with attention and applause, but they are recognized by the heavens. Simple things will help a lot. A small note of appreciation will do. Saying the magic words “Thank You” and a surprise text or phone call may brighten other people’s day. You may also share some words of inspiration and encouragement to your every one around you. Giving of a little of what we have can mean a lot to others (i.e. a listening ear, time, effort, talents, skills, love, etc.)

King Benjamin also reminds us in Mosiah 2: 17:

“And behold, I tell you these things that ye may learn wisdom; that ye may learn that when ye are in the service of your fellow beings ye are only in the service of your God.”

In this year and all throughout, may we continue to study more diligently, pray more earnestly and serve more willingly. If we do so, we will become better people than we were before. We will become “agents unto ourselves” and we “shall in nowise lose our reward”. We’ll find meaning to our existence and we will be happier than ever.

You keep learning. Always praying. And serving. Even more!

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Heavenly Father, are you really there?

And do you hear and answer ev’ry child’s prayer?

Some say that heaven is far away,

But I feel it close around me as I pray.

Heavenly Father, I remember now

Something that Jesus told disciples long ago:

“Suffer the children to come to me.”

Father, in prayer I’m coming now to thee.

Pray, he is there;

Speak, he is list’ning.

You are his child;

His love now surrounds you.

He hears your prayer;

He loves the children.

Of such is the kingdom, the kingdom of heav’n.

This song applies not only to children young in age, but to all of Heavenly Father’s children. We are commanded to ‘call upon God in the name of the Son forevermore” (Moses 5:8). The same commandment was given to Adam when he left God’s presence. From that day to this, prayer has been a way for us to speak to Heavenly Father.
 

How should we pray?

The scriptures teach us that we should pray to Heavenly Father in the name of Jesus Christ because “no man cometh unto the Father, but by [Him]” (John 14:6). We must pray with a humble heart. We must be willing to submit to His will and echo the words of Jesus Christ, “not my will, but thine, be done” (Luke 22:42). We must have a repentant heart to confess the sins we committed when we pray. We can also include others in our prayers especially those who need comfort.

Praying to our Heavenly Father also requires a sincere intention. This intent can be to give gratitude to Heavenly Father for the blessings we have received or to ask for guidance and direction and then act on the answers we receive. Jesus counseled, “Enter into thy closet, and when thou hast shut thy door, pray to thy Father which is in secret; and thy Father which seeth in secret shall reward thee openly” (Matthew 6:6). We must not pray in public to get the attention and approval of other people. However, we can pray in groups as we join our families, congregation, community and friends in prayer. We can pray silently or vocally.
 

What should we pray for?

Praying to our Heavenly Father includes giving gratitude for all of our countless blessings especially the Plan of Salvation and the Savior’s Atonement. We can also pray for light when we feel clouded with confusion, or direction when we make important decisions, etc. We are taught in the Book of Nephi that “…whatsoever [we] shall ask the Father in [Jesus’] name, which is right, believing that [we] shall receive, behold it shall be given unto [us].” Furthermore, it has been written in the Book of Matthew, “Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: for every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.”

Heavenly Father is a loving Father who wants to grant our righteous desires. However, He gives a warning to those who ask for unrighteous things saying, “And if ye ask anything that is not expedient for you, it shall turn unto your condemnation” (Doctrine & Covenants 88:65).
 

When should we pray?

Heavenly Father is on standby 24 hours a day, every day. When we feel the need to communicate with Him, He is ever ready to hear us. We can pray when we are alone or when we are surrounded by people. We should pray before meals and morning and night with our families. We can pray when we are walking to work or when we are doing our chores. Latter-day Saints start and close meetings with a prayer. Praying to our Heavenly Father can be done anytime.
 

How are prayers answered?

Prayers are answered in a multitude of ways, in the Lord’s own time, and in accordance with each person’s individual needs. Answers can come by having feelings of peace about a certain choice or option, or through solutions and opportunities we’d perhaps never have thought of before. Answers can come through the scriptures, through other people, or even through the help of angels who can guide and inspire from the other side of the veil.

When we pray, we must remember that our timing is not God’s timing. In the Book of Isaiah, the Lord said, “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways… For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.” The righteous desires that we cry out to the Lord in prayer are answered through our faithfulness and our willingness to wait upon the Lord. Some blessings come as we desire, some blessings come later, and some do not come until we reach heaven, In addition, some blessings may not be right for us, and the answer given is “no.”

For the blessings that do not come, we read an explanation in the Book of James that reads, “Ye ask, and receive not, because ye ask amiss, that ye may consume it upon your lusts.” The blessings that we ask will not come if our desires are not in line with Heavenly Father’s will. He promised us that “If [we] abide in [Him], and [His] words abide in [us], [we] shall ask what [we] will, and it shall be done unto [us]” (John 15:7).

Praying to our Heavenly Father brings us closer to Him. There is no prayer too silent that He cannot hear nor any place too far away that we cannot reach Him.

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